LadyGypsy.net – the blog of Kimberly Dowd of New Jersey

Dear weather.com,

I checked you tonight to see about the newest stupid winter crapslush storm that’s headed our way and what do you do to me? THIS.

This is NOT nice!

Firstly, as all of the Disney snobs will say, it’s “Walt Disney World.” The one in California is Disneyland. Florida is Walt Disney World. Get it straight.

Secondly, what a douchebaggy thing to do! You know I yearn for warm weather and palm trees and I haven’t been to my MousekeMecca lately. And you just rub that in my face by suggesting I check the weather there? (75 and partly sunny tomorrow) instead of the weather here? (42 with rain/freezing rain/wind)

You stink.

Well, hello, Blog! (nervous laugh). Happy New Year!

I’ve become a subscriber to Better Homes & Gardens magazine. That seems odd since I have neither a home nor a garden, but a one-year subscription was offered to me at $5. FIVE DOLLARS. I couldn’t turn it down. If such a venerable magazine is selling itself for only $5, it’s in trouble and I need to help save it. Viva print media!

The January issue is all about decluttering and becoming better organized. One of the ways BHG is offering to help is by giving us FREE labels for laundry baskets.

If you are into this kind of thing, click the picture to go download. You will have to register at BHG.com, though.

I guess it’s handy to separate laundry while it’s being collected, but I’m not at that point yet. If I was, though, here’s what my label setup would look like.

That/'s more like it!

***

Summing up since I saw you last: We (humans AND dogs) went to Michigan to spend Christmas with WM’s people. It was my first Christmas EVER not at home. It was hard, but I had a nice time. “Fair and Balanced” might be mocked when it comes to news, but I think it has value in relationships. Also, I’m trying not to repeat past mistakes. I spent NYE and NY day at home, reading. New Year is my holiday — the one holiday I don’t go anywhere.

I’ve been off of work since December 22nd and while I fully expect to see my desk and surrounding file cabinet in flames when I return tomorrow, it’s been nice having such an extended vacation. I wonder if they make elastic-waist workpants?

Dear Saturn Ion,

On or about today, I’ve owned you for eight years, or 96 months if you’re a mommyblogger. Doesn’t time fly?

You are the fourth car that I’ve owned and since the first 3 are most likely scrap metal, I’ll pull no punches and say you are the best car I’ve ever had and my favorite. Having your paint NOT peel off in big chunks (car #3, the blue Neon) is plus. So is not constantly smelling like exhaust (car #2, the Mustang) or being the size of the Pacific Princess (car #1, the Ford Fairmont).

Back when I bought you strictly because I had dented the chassis of the Neon and needed a quick no-hassle car purchase RIGHT AWAY I didn’t think you’d last this long.

You’re not the most stylish car out there, but you get me where I’m going in comfort and your trunk makes a great toilet paper and dog food storage area when they go on sale.

And oh, the places we’ve gone! You’ve taken me to Florida, Mississippi, South Carolina, Michigan and Massachusetts without complaint. Sure, sometimes you refuse to start right away in the winter, but sometimes I don’t start right away either. The difference is that I can call out sick. You need to be coaxed into service.

You’re so reliable and haven’t cost me much in repairs at all, unlike your older siblings. Plus, you’ve outlived your brand! There will truly never be another you.

I took you for your biennial inspection today. And while I waited in the cold glass enclosure and half-prayed you wouldn’t stall or otherwise be given the red rejection sticker of doom, I realized that this would be the last time we’d go through this process together.

Because since the world’s ending in December 2012, you’ll be the last car I own.

Thanks for taking me to the end of the earth. Literally.

Love,
Your owner