I expected absolutely nothing from this movie. I expected to walk out 20 minutes in.

Because I hate movies to begin with.

Well, not exactly hate. Movies with me are simply pass/fail. I’m not wired to passively sit 2+ hours in one spot and be amused by whatever I’m shown. When I read, I control the pace. When I do crossword puzzles, my brain and fingers are working. When I play World of Warcraft, I choose my own adventure.

Back to the movie. In the late 1800s, Jake Lonegan (Daniel Craig) finds himself near the town of Absolution with a metal brace around his wrist and no memory. Turns out, aliens have been stalking this two-horse town, abducting residents for the usual battery of crazy medical probing. And something else.

Harrison Ford plays Col. Dolarhyde, a brash and cruel former Civil War Colonel-turned-rich-rancher. Because he’s the richest guy around, his son Percy is a complete tool who bullies the poor residents of Absolution.

Olivia Wilde plays herself in a Western-style dress. Her character’s name is Ella, but make no mistake, she’s Olivia Wilde. She sticks out like a sore thumb. So much so that people in the audience would giggle when she appeared. At least the plot explains away why she’s so … atypical.

Naturally, Lonegan, Dolarhyde, and Olivia Wilde find themselves part of an Absolution-based posse off to find the alien hideout and get their kin back. They call the aliens “demons” which made total sense to me. What would you think if you lived in an era without the concept of space travel?

Here we go: I LIKED THIS MOVIE. They didn’t play it like a cornball spaghetti Western parody. They played it like a Western, and I couldn’t help rooting for this plucky little group to win. Yes, there were a few “huh-what” moments, but again, I wasn’t expecting Henry V. And Daniel Craig wears chaps well, which was a nice counter to the completely-expected Olivia Wilde naked-from-the-back scene.

From WM: “Watching Harrison Ford chew up scenery for two hours is always fun. It was darker than expected, but very akin to Independence Day. ”

And I think that’s why I enjoyed it. You will too, though I probably wouldn’t bring skittish kids. Like WM said, it got pretty dark at times.

I finally finished this book after putting it down twice because I never expected to be bored by the furious love story of Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton.

Once you make it through to the point of their first marriage the book loops over and over. New movie. New gaudy jewel. New place to live. New fights. New movie. She’s always the most beautiful and intelligent woman to ever walk the earth. He’s always wracked with guilt for abandoning family/stage/roots. They were both alcoholics and pill poppers. Shampoo, rinse, repeat.

The most interesting part for me was not their crazy opulent lifestyle, but how much Hollywood changed from their hey-day to the end of their careers.

View all my reviews

1. Do you prefer to be in the driver’s seat or in the co-pilot’s chair, literally and figuratively?

Literally & Figuratively:
If there is someone who would rather take control, that’s great. But let’s not confuse the co-pilot’s seat with the backseat. I love being the navigator/second in command, both in the car and in RL.

2. Do you have a lot of baggage, literally and figuratively?

Literally: I think we have 4 suitcases, so not too much.
Figuratively: I do, but it’s fully claimed, inspected and put away in an orderly fashion. So while it’s there (and who doesn’t have it?) it’s not falling out on my feet while I’m entertaining.

3. How much junk have you got in the trunk, literally and figuratively?

Literally: Not much at all. Some jumper cables that don’t work. A few reusable shopping bags. Tire jack.
Figuratively: It’s the stuff legends are made of. Baby got back.

4. At celebrations where people are drinking, are you more likely to be literally or figuratively drunk as a skunk?

Literally: I don’t think skunks get drunk often, so yes, I’m literally as drunk as a skunk.
Figuratively: Not anymore. I’d rather have 2 good glasses of wine than 16 foul-tasting shots or watered down beer.

5. What’s something you enjoy that’s literally cheesy, and what’s something you enjoy that’s figuratively cheesy?

Literally: Have you tried the queso burrito at Qdoba? OMGeezers….yum! It’ll stop your heart but you’ll have a smile on your face!
Figuratively: The Saturday night Sci-Fi channel movies, namely the really bad ones like Sharktopus! Have you seen this? It’s wretched.

But it really made me want to vacation in Puerto Vallarta.

1. Do you still have your senior yearbook? Where is it?
In a box in my closet. It’s pretty beat, thanks to a basement flood back when I had the house. The pages are stuck together, but for a 20-year-old book (weep!) it’s not so bad.

2. What souvenir did you bring back from your last trip?
I like buying tacky refrigerator magnets from places I go. This probably applies to my last vacation which was so long ago I can barely remember. Okay fine, it was last year.

3. What visible signs are there of your most recent injury?
I get bumps and bruises all the time, but nothing lingers, thank goodness.

4. What’s the neatest wedding favor you’ve ever seen?
John & Kristen’s wedding had lovely votive candles for each guest/couple. If you want to see them (and a bunch of fantastic photos) go here and scroll down to the 19th picture.

5. What do you do with playbills and movie-ticket stubs?
I don’t see many plays at all (I should change that) or movies for that matter (I’m ok with that) so I usually toss all of that stuff.

I’m not very sentimental, I guess.

***
This weekend: Tomorrow we’re going to go see the Cleopatra exhibit at the Franklin Institute. (Groupon, I love you!). Tomorrow night I have a birthday party to attend for my cousin’s kid. (I should just macro that line.) Since I don’t think a 14 year old guy would want a Cleopatra souvenir, I guess I’ll pick up an iTunes gift card for him. Sunday is church in the morning then a lazy afternoon.

Tonight I did laundry after work, as is my habit. There’s something to be said for washing all of my workduds at the end of each week. I use extra bleach to get rid of the stress. Now I’m snuggled up on the sofa half-watching some cornball “Hammer” movies on TMC.

Life is good.

Today, WM told me that before I had to get ready for work, I needed to Google “Sorcerer’s Apprentice Movie.”

Go ahead. Watch the trailer. I’ll wait.

What the hell, Disney? What the effing hell?

Why would you knowingly piss all over one of the most famous and brand-making images of your entire animation franchise?

Why would you tar the memory of this:

I once wanted this as a tattoo

By dressing up Nicolas Cage (?!??!?) as Harry Dresden and pairing him with a clone of 16-year-old Shia LeBoeuf for this pile of horseshit?

This shit ain't right.

There are two types of Disney fans: Those who know everything Walt would have wanted for his company even though they have never met him and those who roll their eyes at group 1. So help me, I don’t trot out Uncle Walt very often at all* but here goes:

Thank God I'm already dead.

WM: It can’t be worse than Haunted Mansion.
Me: @#^&#%^*&^@!^!!
WM: This is what everyone said about Pirates of the Caribbean.
Me: !$@$#%$!@$@%$#!
WM: But that movie had good actors. This has Nicolas Cage.
Me: @^%&^#@$%#&!!!!

What the hell is next? Lindsay Lohan as Ariel? Pete’s Dragon played by the GEICO gecko? Lindsay Lohan as Madame Mim?

When I’m sour at work today, you’ll all know why.

* I disapprove of the sales of Mickey Mouse branded drinking accessories, like shakers & martini glasses & jigs. I don’t think Walt would have wanted that. He’d have loved cigarette lighters though.

(Edited to remove an egregious use of an apostrophe. Bad me!)

The thyroid gland is butterfly-shaped. Photo by Vicki's Nature on Flickr.

Results after 2 months of treatment

With thyroid stuff, we’re looking at two factors: TSH and T4.

Happily, my TSH came down from 6-ish to 3.77, which is normal according to the lab, but still high according to the new guidelines from the AACE, which would like to see TSH under 3. This means the medicine I’m on (Levothyroxine, 50mcg) is working.

Unfortunately, my T4 shot up to 12.44, which is called “high” and is a sign of hyperthyroidism.

Hm.

Doc believes the high T4 is a result of the changes in TSH. Normally, he’d want to up my meds to bring that TSH lower, but that high T4 is preventing him from doing this.

So I’m continuing with the Levothyroxine 50mcg for the next 3 months. Then I’ll go for another round of labwork and we’ll hopefully see a lower TSH and a lower T4.

How am I feeling?

It’s seriously hard to tell. I’m staying up later at night, but that could be because it’s lighter later, and I do love that. By Friday/Saturday/Sunday though, I’m wiped.

I’m not as chilly, but that could be because it’s warm out. I do still carry the sweater around even in 75 degree weather.

I’m not as blue. But my blueness comes and goes. Like everyone else’s blue. Plus, I love Spring!

Wacky side effects?

I can’t take the pill when I’m going to eat. I usually take it at night before bed, but one time I forgot and took it in the morning. I ate breakfast right after and ugh, hork, the nausea! Bleah! Never again.

Also in the first month of treatment, I’d occasionally feel a whooshing lightheaded dizzy sensation. It would only last for a few seconds, but it’s definitely weird. It stopped in the 2nd month.

Why am I blogging this?

1) This is my diary. 2) Because if you Google “levothyroxine side effects” you will find the biggest freak parade of side effects ever seen. It’s scary! Maybe someone will Google that and find this and see that… meh. No big deal. I’m not losing hair. I’m not falling over with vertigo. My tongue isn’t forked. All is well.

***
The Dancing with the Stars finale was tonight. I tossed all my votes to Evan and Anna, although it looks like the judges tossed them under the bus. I’ll miss the results tomorrow night because we’re going to a free screening of Prince of Persia. Not my #1 choice in movies, but since it’s 1) from Disney and 2) based on a video game it shouldn’t suck TOO much. Right? RIGHT?

Ooops.

Anyway, here is everything I knew about the movie going in: First Black Princess, 2D animation, New Orleans/Katrina, Oprah.

I really hope EVERYONE can get past all of that (some well-deserved, some a bit over the top) hype and see the movie for what it is: a BEAUTIFUL, FUN, FUNNY and POIGNANT story of Tiana, a hard-working girl from New Orleans who wants to make her own dream come true. Wishing on a star comes secondary.

The movie’s opening card is a Steamboat Willie animation with the “Walt Disney Animation” title. Very nice, since this is Disney’s first classic 2D animated feature since 2004′s Home on the Range. Remember that one? No? That’s okay. I didn’t either.

The music was catchy New Orleans-style jazz. I admit to doing a bit of dancing in my seat the whole way through. I wasn’t the only one.

Looking for a message in this Disney Classic? There are quite a few:

• Working hard vs. partying
• Haves vs. have nots
• Being boy crazy vs. keeping a level head
• Good magic vs. bad magic
• Working for your dreams vs. wishing for your dreams
• What you WANT vs. what you NEED

But funny enough, I never felt beaten over the head with any of these themes. For example, when Tiana and her mother left Big Daddy’s house via streetcar, you see a change from the mansions to the smaller working-class housing. You immediately know Tiana’s family doesn’t have as much as Big Daddy and Lottie. But Tiana’s family doesn’t whine about being poorer or having to work harder. They just are and do.

And yes, Virginia, there is a happy ending.

But I need to tell you something every review I’ve read failed to mention: there will be tears. Serious sad tears. At one point, everyone in our theater was sniffling or crying. I cried, WM cried, kids cried. If your youngling can’t bounce back quickly from a very sad moment to a very happy one, then I’d actually suggest you want a bit until they can.

I loved this movie. I will buy it when it comes out on DVD and own it forever.

2) I’m ice skating and there are obstacles everywhere. This dream is a direct response to playing Professor Layton & The Diabolical Box, where I had to navigate the little Professor character through 3 different maps. Neat!

Plans:
Heading to a Farmer’s Market with Mom. They’ve advertised with us online for years and after years of doing those ads, I want to see the little farm in person. I will be purchasing at least one apple cider donut while there.

Tonight, WM and I are going to see 9. “A post-apocalyptic nightmare in which all of humanity is threatened.” Should be… fun.

Rabbit rabbit!

Mondays suck after great weekends. Here are the highlights:

• WM and I went to see Wolverine on Saturday night. This is a BIG deal for me as I really don’t like sitting through movies much. It was pretty good. I don’t have an “X-Men” comic background so I entered with no predispositons for/against the characters. Because of that, I like the Victor (Sabretooth?) character more than the Logan (Wolverine) one. This girl ain’t right. After the movie we went to the Cheesecake Factory for dessert. Mmmm…
• I discovered the glory of the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser. WM had used it before, but I wanted to try it on the grubby marks that are always on the refrigerator door handle. And it worked! Then I tried it on the cabinet corners (my kitchen and bathroom are all white) and it worked! Light switches! Dishwasher handle! I had no idea how dirty things were until Mr. Clean opened my eyes. Now, actually, I’m somewhat depressed.
• Mom wanted me to make a necklace for one of her friends. I always enjoy that kind of thing. I’m very pleased with how it came out. I have pictures which I’ll post after the recipient receives the necklace. I had a dream the other night that I started a blog just to chronicle my beading/jewelry making adventures and it managed to make a few dollars, too. I also had a dream I had a pair of cute brown flats to wear to work today, so I’m not too sure of putting stock in what I dream.

The only lowlight is I *think* I *may* be coming down with a cold, which is par for the course for me. I always get a cold in June. But I’m not doing the Vicks Vapo-Rub gimmick this time. Nosiree. I’m doing the Zicam nose swab gimmick instead. The runny nose I had this morning stopped, so we’ll see.

Anyone know when I can take the swab OUT of my nose?

(whoa…this is wordy and history-based. Bet WM will eat this up)

1. On March 6, 1869, Dmitri Mendeleev presented the first Periodic Table of the Elements to the Russian Chemical Society. What memories do you have of your high-school chemistry course?

My high school chemistry teacher, Mr. S. was a very sharp dresser in his early-60s. (I remember him being older. He was probably 36. :/) At times, he’d even wear three piece suits! My best friend and I tracked his wardrobe choices in our chemistry notebooks, and he went almost four weeks without repeating a suit.

Wait, did he mean academic memories? Oh. Um. If you chuck a chunk of Potassium (K) into water, it sparks and almost explodes.

2. On March 6, 1899, the Bayer company registered aspirin as a trademark. When did you last take medication for pain?

The Vile Goddess Menstrua (remember when she used to be a semi-regular blog character?) made not one but TWO appearances in the last 30 days. So I took a Naproxen (I may be divorced from the pharmacist, but I still know that generics are a better deal!) early this week.

3. On March 6, 1853, Giuseppe Verdi’s opera La Traviata premiered in Venice. How do you feel about opera?

Not very interested at all. I was never exposed to it as a young adult (through much fault of my own) and now all I like is the Rabbit of Seville.

4. On March 6, 1947, American film director Rob Reiner (Meathead!) was born. Which of these Reiner-directed films have you seen, and what do you think of them?

Ugh. I’m not a movie person.

* The Bucket List (2007)Didn’t see it. Why grow attached to characters I know will die?
* Rumor Has It… (2005) Didn’t see it. Aniston’s best movie work was Office Space. And I’m Team Angelina, anyway.
* Alex & Emma (2003) Didn’t see it.
* The Story of Us (1999) Didn’t see it.
* Ghosts of Mississippi (1996) Didn’t see it.
* The American President (1995) This one I saw many times and still love. Andrew Shepherd is my 2nd favorite fictional president. My fave is the president in Independence Day.
* North (1994) Nope.
* A Few Good Men (1992) I know I have seen this, but all I remember is the Nicholson quotes.
* Misery (1990) Not a suspense person
* When Harry Met Sally… (1989) Didn’t see this until 2 years ago, when WM promised me it’d cheer me up after BvP and I separated. It was okay.
* The Princess Bride (1987) I avoided this one until 2 years ago. Inconceivable. Very sweet movie. Makes me miss my grandparents.
* Stand by Me (1986) I saw this in 1986 when I as 14. It had cute boys and a dead body.
* The Sure Thing (1985) Nope
* This Is Spinal Tap (1984) Nope

5. On March 6, 1972, American basketball-player Shaquille O’Neal was born. How do you feel about basketball?

Don’t like it at all. Why spend all that time watching the back and forth when all you have to do is watch the last 5 minutes? Also, I think basketball has single-handedly ruined college education for many. They should just draft out of high school rather than make these players pretend to play school for four years and waste money and slots that could go to more qualified and willing students.

***
I’m on furlough today, which means I’m technically not a Gannett employee. So unlike a vacation day, I can’t even be called if something goes wrong. The five days unpaid is a hardship, yes, but I think we’re going to squeak out of the first fiscal quarter without layoffs. Which is good.

Shameless self-promotion: I blogged on the newspaper’s gadget blog yesterday about a World of Warcraft-related product: Authenticate me! I’m now listed as an official author to the blog even though I only have that one post. Which is pretty nifty.

I’m accruing a readership on the World of Warcraft blog too. Which is weird, since I never thought it would catch on. Many of the readers are not local but they certainly love to comment. Makes me feel good.

Of the top five blogs on the C-P site, two are not written by newsroom staff members. One is mine, and the other is Fish Head, written by Coworker A in our IT department. It’s hysterical, and I don’t even fish. If you do fish, check it out! We’re proud of our blogs, because up until now we didn’t have the benefit of name-recognition or promotion from the paper like the reporters do.

Although I’ll likely never see a dime from it, I want to call myself a writer. And the more I’ve been writing, the more ideas I have. Which is good for me, and good for my blogs. Probably not as good for you.

As always, thank you for sticking with me through the writers block and countless memes.